Making Friends

On Sunday we attended fundraiser for my sweet second (or third or something - lol) cousin who has breast cancer.  For the fundraiser they had a silent auction, raffle, food, and a band.  It was really a lot of fun.  As the band was playing a bunch of the kids started to go out on the floor and dance.  Soon Chloe started to inch her way onto the dance floor and in her true form, she stood and stared and observed for quite a while.  I could see that she really wanted to dance with a couple of the other little girls, but instead she just stood and watched.  

Justin had to go to the bathroom so I told him that on his way he should tell Chloe that she can introduce herself and ask the girls if they would like to dance with her.  He did and then walked off.  I stood watching my girl hoping she would get the courage to do what she really wanted and go talk to the girls.  A couple of minutes later she got closer to them and started dancing. She didn't talk to them and wasn't close enough for them to really notice her.  Then my girl decided to put herself out there and ask them to dance.  There was a really sweet little red-headed girl that took her hands and they started twirling and jumping together.  

My heart lept.  I was so proud of my girl.  She continued to dance with the girls and then sat with them while they announced the raffle winners.  Then when it was time to go, again in true Chloe fashion she hugged them all goodbye.

 The next day we went over to my friend Andrea's house and hung out with her and Cassie and all our kiddos.  It was such an amazing day.  In the afternoon we decided to head to the park for a little while.  Andrea and Cassie's children are 1 and 1 1/2, so while Chloe does play with them at times, she was really wanting an older child to play with.  There were quite a few kids running around playing so I told her to go ask if any of them wanted to play.  I told her she could just ask them to play and tell them her name just like she did the night before with the girls that danced with her.  

Surprisingly (to me), she quickly ran off to three cute little girls that looked about her age.  I heard her say in her little voice, "Do you want to play with me?" and then stood there.  Then I saw the girls run off without her.  

And my heart shattered into a million pieces.  

I wanted to go scoop her up and kiss her and tell her it's okay and never let her out of house again, let alone encourage her to ever do something like that again.  

Instead I stood and watched to see what she did.  She came running over to me and said, "They won't play with me".  I asked her why and she said they said they already had 3 people for their Captain Hook game and didn't want any more.  I asked her how that made her feel and she said really sad.  Against everything within me, I told her that sometimes some people are just not very nice and maybe one of the other children would want to play with her.

So, off my brave little girl ran to ask another little girl to play, who was super shy and just ran to her dad. haha.  I think the girl was younger and actually that's probably what Chloe would have done a couple of years ago.  Finally she found a girl probably about 6 and her younger sister.  The girl was super sweet to Chloe and was more than happy to have Chloe play with them.  I heard Chloe ask their names and how old they were as she then introduced herself.  

I stood there as everything was moving in slow motion.  My heart bursting at the love I have for my sweet girl as well as how incredibly PROUD of her I was.  Tears welled up in my eyes as I watched her run and slide and swing with her new friends.  The friends she fought hard for.  She was so brave to not give up.  At one point she came running over to me to tell me about her new friends, Olivia and Chloe.  She was so excited that the younger girl had the same name as her.  When it was time to leave she was sure to tell Olivia goodbye and give her a hug and then she said, "Thank you for playing with me!"  

And as we were leaving I DID scoop her up and kiss her, but this time to tell her how incredibly brave I think she is and how proud I am of her and blessed I am to have her as my sweet sweet daughter.

And when I put her down and we were walking out, this is what she said to me: "You know those other girls?  If they don't want to be my friends then they're just not my friends".  As easy as that.  

Nobody ever warns you about how sometimes the love in your heart for your children makes it truly feel like it's going to explode.